Monday, August 13, 2012

Matt #18

Holy cow what a week.... So many much needed e-mails... Thank you mom and dad for everything. This E-mail today will be focusing on both of you but to answer your question dad I have never seen old faithful and so when I return I want to spend as much time with my family traveling and seeing the sites of the world haha I think my sisters will be a little freaked out to hear that I want to spend time with the family traveling once I return haha but thats one of the many things that have changed in me because of the mission. Also Olivia thank you for the E-mail I miss and love you all too and dont worry your not a bad friend, your one of the best! :) Alyssa also thank you for the E-mail and dont worry your not the only one wondering what exactly the Lord needs from us. But I can promise you as long as you work hard and pray with faith everything will work out. Once again thank you for the e-mails everyone I always print them out and re-read them because there like scripture for me... no matter how many times I read them I always find something new and inspiring in them that really help me out. I hope you know how much I love you all.
        Well Im not sure where to really begin other then this was one of the greatest and hardest weeks of my whole Mission. I learned more about life and myself then I ever thought possible haha my brain actully fills like its going to explode right now. Well to begin I learned two very important lessons about myself this week. 1. Im terrible with money and really need to work on that haha (Thank you mom and dad for the love and support) 2. I've always taken for granite what true love is in my life. What is true Love? Occasionally we learn something that has profound influence in our lives and I know this week was one of those occasions for me.
        So what is true Love? What is pure Love? I think Todd R. Callister makes it pretty clear for us. "Sacrifice-The Highest form of Love." Sacrifice is the highest form of Love, Sacrifice implies doing one thing at the expense of another thing that has equal, or maybe greater, appeal. Everybody who is reading this E-mail think of someone in your life who is the perfect example of this.... When I think of Pure Love I think of my incredible parents. Think of how much they sacrifice for all of us everyday. Parents are everything in this life and sometimes we take for granite what there love for us truly means.
                 This week was extremly hard for me and yesterday I had another breakdown... I think Missionarys need breakdowns because it allows all of our emotions and stress to leave haha I'm not sure why I broke down but I did and all felt hopless.... I remember sitting there with the tears slowly rolling down my face and I could only think of two people who mean everything to me... My Mother and Father. I thought how much I wanted and needed their Pure sacrificing Love, There I was yesterday as a 19 year old boy crying and wanting my Mothers soft loving embrace, and my Fathers loving comforting words of advice, I wanted my parents to comfort me in my small moment of pain but then I remembered the Saviors Pure Love for us.... He gave his very life for us and he endured everything for me and for  you.... The Lord Atoned for our sins and because of this we shouldnt be afraid to do all we can possible do for the Lord, He did everything for us and I mean everything... We should be willing to give just a little back to him. (Two years) (Either 12:26-27) "The Lord makes weak things become strong" Those who humbly and faithfully wait upon the Lord may, like the eagles, soar above their weakness. Our Savior loves us very much and as long as we do our part we will become all that the Lord needs us to be. Through the Saviors Pure Love (Atonement) All things are possible.
               This week was such a growing week for me, I just learned so much about myself and whats really important in my life. I love what Lawrence E. Corbridge said about change "As you consider the question of what kind of person you will become, you must understand the dynamic process of life. You not only can change but you do change all of  the time. Sometimes people donot believe this. They excuse their  failures and weaknesses by saying: "That's just the way Iam." "I am just short tempered, impatient person." I can't get up in the morning. That's just the way I am." "That's my nature." Or, "I'm just shy. That's all. That's just who I am." "I am not really a spiritual person."To believe that weaknesses and deficiencies in your character are unchangeable is to reject the central truth of the plan of salvation. You are not cast in stone. You not only can change but you do change all of  the time. You are a dynamic, changing, evolving being. You are always changing. You never stay the same. You cannot stand still. You are right now the sum total of what you have thought, said, seen, heard and done. What youthink, say, do, hear and see, cause you to change; to change for good or evil; to become either stronger or weaker; to either internalize the qualities of light or the qualities of darkness. You are responsible for who you are and you are responsible for who you will become. Do you know what kind of person you want to become? Do you see in your mind who you want to be? Do you know?"  Family, Friends, Mom, Dad, and anybody else reading this E-mail I want you to know that I know what kinda Missionary I want to be... I know what person I want to become in my life... I know what kind of Father I must work to become. I want to be the man that honors his priesthood and gives not only his time and strength to the Lord but also my Heart. I know this is Gods work. I know this Church is true. Im also sorry my e-mail has included nothing about brasil or my investigators but only my testimony... dont worry I will try and send more letters explaining this incredible place called brasil haha. Also my Journal im keeping is a really good record of my day to day activites so dont worry you will all eventually learn whats happening down here in brasil :) One cool thing is yesterday I taught the young men in our ward about the plan of salvation and guess what... I talked for a whole hour in Portuguese about Gods plan for us! Now it wasnt perfect but I still was able to do it. The Lord works mighty miracles in our life especially when we give everything to him. We just need to take the time to realize these changes and blessings. I love you all with a Pure Love. Thank you for all your letters and love. I miss you all so much but I know this is where I have to be right now in my life. Its time to give everything including my Heart to the Lord in this work. Love you all :) (Sorry for the incredible long e-mail)

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