Thursday, August 30, 2012

Ben #19

Well Training is done! Kinda weird to think how fast time flys by. Its really crazy actually haha... Fist though, like always, thank you everyone for your emails. Jordan meu amigo! Seu E-mail fez meu dia! Dont worry it made sense! haha. Mas agora eu espero eventualmente você pode fazer uma missâo denova. O Senhor, ele presica você em esta obra, intenge? Eu sei que seu o dor em  cabaça vai cura, com tempo... O senhor vai abencoar você! Tem fê nele, O Senhor :) Jordan man, I love you! Sounds like life is good for ya. Jenni, Alyssa. Thank you for your love and testimonies, what an inspiration they are to me. I truely can feel them. Mom your story about the Lillies really brought the spirit to my heart and answerd some burning questions I had, so thank you... Dad your quotes and story about Brother Webb were a blessing. I to lately have been struggling with that. There is so many people I want to go visit, but im only a junior so dont have much say at the moment. I know the Lord is and has prepared his children for this Gospel and EVERYONE deserves a chance to hear the it... That quote you gave from The prophet John Taylor struck me. We missionarys will be held accountable for the people we teach. I was thinking alot about this last night. MY heart was so... conflicted sorta speak. I cant tell you how many people I have met on the street here in Anhanguera that have told me "Oh, yeah I was already baptized in your church."- this statement hits me harder then a cannonball! Do these people realize the convenat they have made, How really important this is!? but as I thought about it more I realized, Its our job as missionarys to help these people realize the importance. Sometimes I think we as missionarys just get caught on the idea of getting baptisms... Baptisms are important dont get me wrong. Its our purpose! Its why im here!... But Its our job to TEACH and MAKE SURE they understand what they are commiting to do. To live the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and take HIS name upon him. Like I said my heart hurts from this, but at the same time has given me strength and understanding as to what I want to be as a missionary. I want to help people have a lasting conversion to this Gospel... That is my purpose. Thank you for the quote again Dad. Oh, and sorry to hear about the mice... Keep fighting! haha
Well onto the adventures of this past week. I bet you are all just waiting to hear whats going on with tranfers and things, right? haha Well it turns out im staying with my trainer Elder Clay for another transer here in Anhangura. We have a ton of new investigators that are so excited about the Gospel. Last sunday we had 6 investigators come to church... 6!!!! I was on cloud nine! haha So im really excited to have another transfer here in Anhangura. I love this area and the ward. This lady named Irmâ Anna Maria in our ward reminds me of you mom. :) She actually told me last Sunday she wants to adopt me, so I have to write home and tell you I cant come home in two years haha! She is great... But dont worry mom, no one comes close to being as amzing as you. Anyway so thats whats going on here Brasil. The Lord still has something for me to learn here with Elder Clay.
Ok, so this week... Its funny every week when I read my Brother Matts emails its pretty much the exact thing that happened to me. He explains so clearly his experiences, that it sounds almost exactly what I experienced, its crazy... Its almost like were Twins or something... haha but in all seriousness its true. I too started to become comfortable with being a missionary and began to just be relaxed with everything. I kept working hard and doing everything that I was suppose to but something was just bugging me. Bugging me to the degree where I started to become frustrated. What was this feeling!? Why was I feeling it!? Im doing what im suppose to arnt I? Preaching, teaching, keeping the rules! what am I doing wrong Heavenly Father?... Well, once again the Lord, like my brother said humbled me... I was on the bus heading to another area late Monday night. The bus was crowded and I was caught in the middle of people, shoulder to shoulder... Here in Brasil, the Brazilans are a little shorter, so I stuck out in that crowd. I looked forward and saw my reflection in the window of the bus. I saw my combed over hair, my white shirt, my tie, and then... my name tag. The name tag that reads the name of our savior and brother Jesus Christ. Here I was caught in the middle of all this people, but stood out, Not because I was taller then them, or the fact that I am an American... but because of that reason... The reason that I bear the name of Christ... Im ashammed to say that this week I forgot that. I forgot I have the name of Christ near my heart. I felt like crying on that bus right then and there. I had allowed myself to become ME and not HIM. I become comfortable with (as Matt said) My abilitites and not the abilitites of the Lord. I felt so terrible. The Lord had blessed me with so many things over this past 5 months and showed me so many marvelous things and lifted me in so many ways... and then in a span of one week I allowed myself to become, like I said, ME again and not HIM. Family and Friends, I think there is something of great vaule here for us all to learn. To NEVER forget our savior. To always rely on his abilties. When things start to go our way its easy to forget the times when we were struggling. The times when the Lord truely picked us up and carried us... but the Lord loves us, he never turns his back on us. no matter how many times we turn our backs on him. That night when I said my prayers I felt his love, His Atonement. You have read in my past emails the power I have experienced with prayer and let me tell you and testify as a messanger of the restored Gospel... Someone is listening, God is there for us no matter what we have done. No matter how many times we turn our backs He will never turn His. We can use his Atonement in all things, I know it. The apostle Paul said "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God, (Even a missionary)... but Christ is the author of salvation unto all them that obey him." We can use the Atonement we can turn to God. Just remember like I have said before MAKE HIM a part of your life and place trust in him not man. 
This week I forgot that, I became comfortable with MY abilities and forgot the blessings of God. I didnt rely on the spirit, and thus the Lord humbled me and once again showed a weak boy what he must do to change. Family, friends allow the Lord to change your heart. Allow his love to feel you. Allow yourselves, no matter what your facing right now, good or bad to remember the blessings your Lord as bestowed upon you. I know Christ lives. His love is eternal. I know sometimes we need to taste the bitter to realize the sweet. Sometimes that can be a tough thing to swallow but we can do it. One of my favorite scrpitures here on the mission is found in 1 Nephi 7: 12. The Lord can do all things. We can do all things through him.. This week was a huge eye opener. I feel a tremondous change on my outlook of my Savior Jesus Christ. I feel him so close to me. I never realized back home how much the Lord blessed me. Just take a moment or two and really ponder and "Count your Blessings" remember the Lord always and that we NEED him more then anything in our lives... I need him. Clint, Jason you both are getting ready to head out here to the great and wonderful work of God. My prayer for you and for everyone back home is dont become comfortable. Always look for the ways to better incoperate your Lord in Savior in your life. Remeber him and trust in HIS abilities.
Family, Friends... I love you so much. I pray for you all and even more feel your prayers lift me up. This week, in my opinion, was the begining of something special for me. A relization and better understanding of the love our Savior has for us. Im not perfect but im trying to be the best I can be and make my Lord, redeemer, and savior proud... I once again love you all and love this missionary work. There is nothing greater I so testify... I cant wait to hear from you all once again. Everyone! haha I just love reading and feeling your testimonies. What a strength. :) God be with you all
Love Elder Benjamin B. Doggett  
p.s. Matt my Brother I love you! Thankyou for your email this week. We are experiencing the same things! Crazy! but I love you and keep up this great work!

No comments:

Post a Comment